Adopt-A-Troll
by Let Go of My Faygo
Summary: When a new gimmick appears on the MS paint pages, a few Homestuck fans make quick haste to take part in the chaos, not realizing what they were getting into in the least bit. Maybe those trolls weren't cosplayers after all... And yes, you read that title right.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello, my fellow Homestuck fans! This is my second Homestuck story, and hopefully it's quite original :) ****Now, I will warn you and say it's an OCXCharacter story, so if you don't roll that way, please hit the back button and presume your search for the right fanfic for you. **

**Any who, I will go ahead and put up quick OC bios for you all to refer to, if you are interested:**

**Suki Brooks: (Note that "Suki" is not her real name). She is a friendly 16-year-old with a friendly, yet sarcastic personality. She has a very big lazy side to her, and technology is definitely not her best friend. She has longish-curly brown hair and green eyes, and loves to dress casually no matter where she is. **

**Adam Harris: A some-what shy young man with a big heart. He tends to worry a lot over the littlest of things, and due to his shyness he doesn't seem to get out very much and tends to keep only in-school relationships. He has short black hair and hazel colored eyes, tends to dress kinda nerdy, and is covered in freckles. Like his best friend, he is 16 years old. **

**Anya Martin: A charismatic 16-year-old who has a bitchy side she is not afraid to show. She can be quite stubborn, although is a very loyal friend. She has bright blonde hair that spikes up in the back, as well as bright blue eyes. (Note: Anya is not my OC, but is my friend's, Musoka-Chan7497)  
**

**As you can see, I will be changing the ages a tad just to fit with the story. Anyway, I hope you enjoy!**

**WARNINGS: _This story will include a lot of bad language (Mostly because of Karkat and Gamzee's colorful vocabulary), incredible stupidity among friends (as it should be), lack of yaoi (oh no we are all gonna die) and possible sexual themes later on (however, if they do occur, they will be quite mild, as it should be for a T rating). _**

* * *

"You can't do this to me."

"Oh, I think I can."

"Please, I thought you loved me."

"I do, but it has to be done."

"No, I- AH!" She screams as the blankets are removed from her body, exposing her to the dreadfully bright lights that had been turned on. Her eyes, even though they hadn't opened quite yet, were already squinting as her arms shot up to cover her face.

"The light, it burns!" She cries out dramatically, kicking her legs out like a child. The figure standing beside her bed was not amused.

"Suki, I don't have time for this. Get up now," the older woman, her mother, says in a irritant tone. The younger girl, known as Suki, slowly opens her eyes, although she is temporarily blinded by the dreadful light. Her mother had already left the room leaving the door wide open. Suki could only lay there in her bed, terribly comfortable in the time being.

But of course, she was going to have to get up if she was ever going to get to school on time.

She certainly was a sight to see in the morning. Her long hair was literally sticking up at all angles, full of knots that were going to be quite painful brushing out. Bags were clearly seen under her eyes, and her pajamas were in a complete wreck from her constant tossing and turning throughout the night.

Her morning routine, however, carried on as if nothing was wrong. Although she was half asleep the young teenager was still able to make herself a bit of breakfast, mostly consisting of stale cereal and milk, and proceeded to actually brush her hair out. With her hair free of knots and her teeth brushed afterwards, the girl manages to throw on a respectably clean sweatshirt and a pair of worn-out jeans.

Absolute perfection.

"Suki, come on already," her mother called impatiently from the bottom of the stairs. She was tapping her foot, checking the time on her watch. She had to get to work, and until her daughter got off her lazy butt to get her license, she always had to take the school detour. The woman looks up just as her daughter was coming downstairs, walking down slowly and with caution. Her eyes were directed into the phone she had in her hand, her thumbs moving swiftly among the screen. Her mother simply rolled her eyes, and grabbed hold of her daughters wrist to pull her towards the door.

"Hey! I was texting someone!" Suki cries out, barely having enough time to grab her backpack that was sprawled beside the front door with the way her mother was rushing her out.

"You will get a chance to talk to them when you are at school. Now hurry up, I don't want to be late," the older woman says as she shuts the front door behind her. Suki mumbled under her breath, throwing her backpack over her shoulder.

Then the way to school was the same as it usually was. The short drive with that little bit of traffic in between with other parents dropping their kids off. Suki pouted in her seat, still incredibly tired from the lack of sleep she got- ten hours was simply not enough, according to most teenagers today.

Then the rest of her morning would begin. Her mother would drop her off and Suki would enter the large, bland building most people would call a "School." She would pass by her classmates, the upperclassmen, and the underclassmen in the thin hallways. She would try her best not to brush shoulders with them, but unfortunately it was a failing attempt. Eventually she would make it to her locker, where she would see two people that she would actually want to talk to.

"Hey guys," she would say cheerfully as she would approach. The two would look over at her and smile.

One of these people was her best friend, Anya. She was always the one Suki could find in a crowd, due to her crazy, spiked blond hair. She was leaning on the lockers, chatting away with with the young man, who was also by the locker. This young fellow was known as Adam, and he while he was a good friend of Suki's, although not quite the best. He was nodding to what Anya was talking about, but the way his nose was in his phone it was obvious he wasn't listening too closely.

"Hey Suki," Anya greets, while Adam merely muttered a formal "Hello." Suki raises a brow, standing on her toes to look over his shoulders.

"What are you looking at?" she asked, barely getting a glance at the screen as Adam pulls the phone away. He stuffs it in the pocket of his khaki pants, frowning at her.

"None of your business " He says, giving her a sharp look. Suki put her hands up, in a way to mock his sudden hostility. Anya rolled her eyes as a result.

"He won't admit that he's addicted to Homestuck," she says bluntly, giving the nerd a sly smile.

"I am not," He says, frowning at the blonde. It was now Suki's turn to roll her eyes as she opened up her locker.

"Jegus, you act like it's a crime to like it or something," she says.

"Jesus, you mean."

"No, Jegus. It's a Homestuck thing you should know, dude," Suki replies as she literally throws her backpack into her locker. Adam gives her quite the frown as he pulls his phone back out and continues to browse around. Anya leans in close to her friend.

"If you're wondering, he's reading the third act of Homestuck," she whispers. Suki giggled a bit, taking out a fairly large binder. Take notice that not only was it thick with notes, but the cover had been doodled on with sharpie of various characters and little shapes she created. It's obviously the binder of a very productive student.

"Then why is he acting like he's watching porn or something? It's not like Homestuck is a crime to like," she says. Adam looked up.

"Well, it's not like it's a very cool thing to like either," he says. Anya gives him a sly look.

"That shouldn't effect you too much then."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," Adam mutters, taking note of her hidden insult. Before either of the three speaks another word, the bell decides to ring, signaling that it is time for homeroom.

The friends were lucky that they all shared homeroom, because it was much more fun starting the day off with one another. It was unfortunate that this was the only time of the day they all had together besides the lunch period. But that really isn't the point here.

After battling and shoving the other students to get to homeroom on time, Adam makes an important discovery as he continues to wonder through the MS paint adventure pages.

"Hey, have you guys checked this out yet?" he asks, looking up at his two other friends.

"Checked what out? Oh my Gog, is there a new update?" Suki says, her eyes widening in excitement. Anya patted her friend on the shoulder.

"Suki, Hussie is at Comic Con this weekend. He isn't going to be updating anything."

"Oh yeah. Dammit..."

"I'm not talking about the Comic Con thing," Adam says, sounding a bit frustrated. He then takes a deep breath to chill out a bit. "I was talking about this new _Adopt-A-Troll _thing that's going on."

"Adopt-a-troll?" Anya and Suki say simultaneously. Adam cringes.

"Guys, you know how much I hate it when you do that-"

"Just tell us what Adopt-a-troll is," Anya says impatiently.

"Okay okay!" Adam grumbles. "It says here that Hussie is doing this thing where you can bid on your favorite troll, and if you win the bid, then they get to live with you for a year."

"Really? That's so cool," Suki says enthusiastically. Anya raises a brow at the brunette.

"Um, actually it's not-"

"Everyone please take your seats, I need to take attendance," the teacher, Ms. Thomas, calls out to all of her rowdy students. Since she is typically a crabby teacher when instructions are not followed, the students immediately take their seats, and their talking was now reduced to whispers. The three friends take their seats in the desks in the back, with Suki sitting between the two. Anya leans over, keeping her voice low.

"Like I was saying, that is a really stupid idea," She whispers. Now it was Suki's turn to raise a brow.

"How is that not cool? You live with your _favorite _troll for a whole year!" she says.

"Suki, you _do _realize that these aren't the real trolls, right? It's just going to be just a bunch of random cosplayers who are dressed like the trolls."

"Actually, it says here that these are legit and not some losers in a costume," Adam chimes in. Anya leaned forward on her desk a bit to make it easier to glare at the boy. Adam looked at her back, and then shut up as he went back to his reading.

"That's what I thought," she mutters. "And really Suki, do you really want some creepy cosplayer living in your house for a year?" Suki shrugs, still smiling.

"I don't know about a whole year, but I think it would be cool to experience. I wonder if they are good cosplayers," She taps a finger on her chin at the thought.

"Either way it would just be a waste of money. Let the crazy Homestuckers have all the fun with that," Anya says with an eye roll. Suki smacks her hand on her desk lightly.

"You know what? We should try and go for it! How cool would it be to say that we have trolls at our house?" She pauses for a second. "Okay, well the way I said that makes it just sound retarded, but it would still be so cool."

"Okay, I can already see a couple of problems with that idea though," Adam started. "Unlike you guys, I hardly know who any of the trolls are. Secondly, my parents and I would never want a creep wearing horns to stay in our house for an _entire year._"

"For once I'm with Mr. Tight-wad there."

"Hey!"

"It's just a dumb idea for Hussie to make a quick few bucks," Anya says, leaning back in her seat a bit. "Like he did with those idiots who payed ten thousand dollars to get their fan trolls in the comic. I mean, they do realize that Hussie won't keep them in very long? When they actually show up, they aren't going to last more then ten pages, at the most anyway."

"Wait, are you saying that two people paid ten _thousand _dollars to get their OCs in the story?" Adam asks in astonishment. While the two engaged in a hushed conversation about the stupidity of some fans, Suki was already coming up with a list of things she was going to do with her troll when he would show up.

Oh yeah. She is going to do it, no matter what her friends say.

* * *

**Seriously though, who would pay that much just to get their fan trolls a few seconds in the comic? Such a waste of good money too.**

**Anyway, the first chapter wasn't the most interesting, but hopefully by the second chapter I can get started on the real story :D Just think of this as a little prologue to what is coming up next.**

**Feedback is always appreciated!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you everyone for your immediate reviews ^^ I wasn't thinking I would get any on the first chapter, since that never happens for me :D Now to respond to the anonymous reviewers:**

**Guest: Haha, who wouldn't want to spend a year with a troll? Although my immediate choice would be Gamzee. Thanks for the review! **

**Seleceana: I had no intentions of stopping :D Thanks for the review.**

**Person: Haha I'm glad you approve :D I actually had another idea for Adam, but now that you mention it... hmm... XD Thanks for the review!**

**The Zoster: I will try to update as fast as I can. Thanks for the review!**

**OH YEAH. I also forgot to mention Suki's little brother. He was supposed to be in the last chapter, but I kinda forgot to add him :P He will be in this chapter though, since he actually kinda is important for the storyline later... hehe... **

**Anyway, on with the story~**

* * *

"Come on, come on," Suki was muttering. With her legs crossed over one another on the couch, the girl was leaning over her computer, with her eyes much too close to the screen. Obviously this wasn't healthy.

"Just a few more seconds," she says, biting down on her fingernails. Her best friend Anya had happened to be over at the same time, and she was looking at her friend strangely. A textbook laid in her lap, and the highlighter she was using had stopped moving across the page.

"What in the world are you doing? Are you even researching the Russian revolution?" she asks, her blonde brow cocked upward. Suki, however paid no attention as her arms were suddenly thrown upward.

"YES! Oh hell YES! I knew I would win!" She screeched, humming out a little victory tune afterwards. "Alright, now for-HEY!" She screams as a pillow smacks across her face. Her hair immediately frizzed up, and she shot her friend an immediate glare.

"What the hell Anya?" She snaps, blowing a strand of hair out of her face.

"Please tell me you aren't betting on a troll," her friend says. Suki grins, which makes Anya droop her head in disbelief. "Oh my God..."

"Oh come on, I wasn't even betting on a troll for myself," Suki says, waving her hand as a way to brush Anya off. The blonde nods, rolling her eyes a bit.

"I hope not. It would be such a waste of money for-"

"I was getting one for you! I had to use your credit card though," Anya froze right there on the spot after Suki had spoken. She slowly turned her head to the brunette, her jaw open partly.

"You did _what?_"

"Yeah! I got you Karkat, your favorite troll," She squeals a bit in her enthusiasm, turning her laptop around. Sure enough, right there on the bidding screen, was the grumpy troll Karkat, and the name of the top bidder being _Anya Martin. _The blonde's jaw was now dropped, and anger boiled inside of her.

"Oh my God-"

"Gog," Suki corrects. Her best friend didn't care, and literally threw her giant textbook behind her.

"_I'm going to kill you!_" She hisses, lunging forward across the couch. Suki screeched, placing her laptop on the coffee table before she took off. Anya was hot in her pursuit, her hands reached outwards she tried to grab the flighty brunette. The chase was played throughout the entire house, racing around every last possible corner and knocking over various furniture and such. They even sent Suki's little brother toppling down the stairs, who was forgotten in the previous chapter. Sorry Evan!

At that moment, Adam had made his way over. The young man was coming over out of boredom, and the fact that he had to return Suki's notes after borrowing them that day. They didn't help at all, however, since the papers were covered in doodles and such. As he approached the house, he could hear screaming, and the sounds of toppling furniture.

"_GET BACK HERE!" _roared Anya.

"_I DID YOU A FAVOR- OW!" _cried Suki.

_SMACK, _went Adam's palm against his head. He sighed, and knocked on the door. He had to wait a moment before someone had answered. Since we left him out last chapter, let's give him some spotlight, shall we?

"Hi Adam," says little Evan, holding a ice pack to the side of his head. Adam looks down at the boy, blinking a few times.

"Did you get knocked down the stairs again?"

"Yeah. But I'm okay, it's just a little bump."

"How many fingers am I holding up?"

"... Two? No, three!" The little boy says, pointing a finger at him. Adam was holding up two fingers.

"... Yeah, you're fine," he says, patting the boy on the shoulder before walking inside. Immediately he stops, taking in the sight of the couch being flipped over. Thankfully, the coffee table was alright, and so was her bright pink laptop. Other then that, it was a disaster.

"What in the world," He exclaims, running a hand through his greasy hair. Suddenly, Suki races around the corner, and shoves the boy out in front of her. Adam is caught off guard, his eyes widening at the suddenly movement. Before he could react, the wind was knocked out of him as Anya came crashing into him like a running back for the school football team.

"OW! What the hell Adam?" Anya scolds, forcing herself to stand up after her collision. Adam glares up at her, groaning as the wind came back to his lungs.

"Oh you know, just being a victim. Don't worry, I don't have any head trauma or anything."

"I might," Evan calls from the side, rubbing his head with the ice pack. Of course, like he was ignored last chapter, no one paid any attention to the eight-year-old.

"What is going on anyway? Why are you trying to kill Suki _this _time?" Adam made sure to put emphasis in his words. This wasn't the only time he had walked into Suki's house like this, watching the brunette running away from Anya's wrath. This also wasn't the only time he was thrown against the ground to buy Suki a few extra seconds to get away.

"You remember that adopt-a-troll thing you told her about?" Anya snaps, her fists on her hips. Adam flinched at her tone- Anya was terrifying when she was angry.

"Y-yeah."

"Well, for some reason she decided to go ahead and bid."

"... So, you're trying to kill her for getting herself a cosplayer?"

"No! I could care less about what she wants to buy, but for some reason the moron decided to take _my _credit card and adopt a troll with it!"

"For you?"

"No, for the old guy down the street _YES FOR ME!_" She snapped. Adam flinches again, throwing his hands up in defense, although the blonde wasn't planning on hitting the pathetic nerd.

"Well, have you tried to return the order, rather then try to maul your best friend?"

"You can't return a bid," Anya retorts. Adam shook slightly, walking over to the laptop. Although the couch was turned over, he did his best to seat himself on it, with the pink laptop placed carefully in his lap.

"You never know. Maybe we can- hm?" He cuts himself off. He sees two other tabs on the screen. From what little information they had on them, it was saying that it was the same bidding page. Surely if she was going to get one for one friend, she would get one for herself, but...

_Oh no._

"Suki you did not," Adam mutters out loud. He pulls up one of the tabs, and sure enough, she had. With his name and credit card number (which she had somehow gotten from him), and the picture of a girl troll, she had done this unspeakable to him as well.

"I don't even know who the fuck these trolls are! Who the heck is Kanaya? And how did you get my credit card?" Adam was ranting. That was when Suki had decided that she was going to return for the moment.

"I know you aren't that far yet, but I thought it would be fun if you got a troll with Anya and I! I made sure to get Kanaya since she is kind of uptight like you are-"

And then the girl had to run, because not only was Anya trying to get her, but skinny little Adam had decided to join the deadly chase.

* * *

Now we go to a completely different location. We see a man who looks incredibly bored, as if he didn't have anything to live for in life. Actually, that probably is true, if he wasn't the writer of a famous web-comic that has been mentioned a few times in this story already. He also wrote other stuff, but many people don't know that, nor do they care.

This man was known as Andrew Hussie, or Hussie as most homestuckers refer to him as. He was just a man who was screwing around on his computer, and though we wish he was working on updates, he currently was not.

"Mr. Hussie," says a lovely woman's voice. A little white lady saunters into the room, a colorful hood over her chubby little head. Her name was Ms. Paint, and was a dear and loyal friend of Hussie's. The older man looks over his shoulder, giving her his attention.

"I wanted to know how the bidding's were doing," the little lady asks. Hussie lets out a sigh, turning his chair around completely.

"Alright, I guess. I'm kinda surprised it isn't as popular as I thought," he mutters. Ms. Paint tilts her head to the side.

"Are we not getting high bids?"

"Not as high as I was thinking," he says. "I mean, I made over twenty thousand dollars getting some suckers, I mean fans, to put their fantrolls into the story."

"How much are you getting on the bids?"

"Well, Karkat had the highest, and he got a little over-"

"Andrew _Hussie_," cries the odd voice of the troll, Eridan. His wavy accent was noticed greatly at his stern sounding words as he barges into the room, surprising both Hussie and Ms. Paint.

"What do you want, Eridan? Can't you see I'm busy?" Hussie says, his annoyance as noticeable as Eridan's accent. The troll glares over, his arms crossed.

"When are you finishing up with those bids? I wish to see my biggest fan immediately," he demands. Hussie bit his lower lip slightly, running a hand through his hair.

"Soon. Your bids are going up so high, that I had to extend the time for just a little longer," Hussie answers in a strained voice. Eridan gives him a suspicious look, but nods anyway.

"Very well. But don't take too long," afterwards he finally left the room in search of the other trolls, most likely to gloat. Hussie lets out, yet, another exhausted sigh. Ms. Paint taps her pale chin.

"Um, Hussie, when are you going to tell him that you didn't even bother putting him up for the bids?"

"Soon. Let him have his moment for now."

* * *

**And that concludes, yet, another chapter of Adopt-A-Troll :D Hopefully the next one will be up very soon. I also have another Homestuck story posted right now: "Homestuck: the Fan Edition" the title is totally lame right now, but I would love it if you guys could take a glance at that one as well, and maybe leave some feedback on it too? **

**In conclusion, feedback is always welcome, so please leave a review :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Now to respond to the Anonymous reviewers:**

**_can't login sorry_: Thank you so much :D I'm glad my story is worth the read. I try my best anyway! Thanks for the helpful feedback. That is exactly what I am looking for!**

_**jerk girls kiss: **_**of course I will! I'd hate to disappoint you know. **

**Now to continue on~**

**Note: No addresses used in this story are legit. Seriously, I just typed in random crap, so don't get any ideas to be creepers...**

* * *

"Honk."

"Shut up."

"Honk."

"I said shut up, you douche."

"... Honk."

"I said fucking shut up!" Karkat snapped, punching his friend in the arm as hard as he could. Gamzee only chuckled a bit, relaxing further in his seat. The troll was practically sliding out with how far he was slumped in.

"Relax, motherfucker," he coos, gazing out the window of his seat. Unfortunately, due to Hussie being kind of cheap, the best transportation the trolls could have received was a taxi from the airport. It was small, cramped, and wearing some of their patience.

"Relax? We are riding around in this piece of shit, on our way to a year of human hell because they paid a few fucking bucks. How in the fuck am I supposed to relax?"

"Karkat, you need to calm down. You act like it's the end of the world," says the third troll in the car. It was the lovely Kanaya, who was currently putting on another coat of lipstick on her lips, choosing a dark green color rather then black. She is careful of her fangs as she rubs her lips together to smooth it out.

"Yeah, like she said. You just need to motherfucking chill, bro," Gamzee says, tapping his fingers along the cloth of the seat. Kanaya, who was currently sitting in the passengers seat, turned around to look at the highblood.

"Gamzee, you really should sit up. It wouldn't be polite to arrive at the house in such a rude manner," she says, her tone pitching a bit. Gamzee immediately sits up, his relaxed look remaining as if the motherly scold didn't effect him in the least bit. He still had to hunch over though, since his horns hit against the top of the taxi and prevented him otherwise. Kanaya then turns to Karkat.

"And you should really cheer up a bit, and try to be positive about this. You are going to be staying with one of your biggest fans for a whole year, you know."

"Oh yes, thank you for reminding me of my wonderful luck. Woopy-fucking-do," he mutters, crossing his arms and pouting like a human child. Kanaya rolls her eyes and turns back in her seat.

"I wonder what our fans are like. I certainly hope mine is a gentlemen," she wonders out loud. Karkat scoffs.

"Not to burst your bubble Kanaya, but fans are creepy as fuck. If anything, you probably got some smelly fat ass who is some kind of rancid pervert of some kind," He says. Gamzee shakes his head.

"Like Feferi's fan. The poor motherfucker," he mutters, feeling sympathy for the poor sea-dweller. Kanaya furrows her brows.

"I highly doubt that someone with a name like _Adam _will be such a creep, thank you."

"You're right. He sounds like some kind of annoying fuck of some sort."

"Karkat, you really are testing my patience," Kanaya grumbles, now crossing her arms. She pleaded inwardly that Adam wasn't going to be as annoying or a creep like Karkat was suggesting. At least Gamzee was having a positive look on this whole thing.

Just to clarify, this wasn't exactly the trolls idea. None of them were really big on the idea of being auctioned off like some kind of item, but it was Hussie's idea of fun, and probably a quick way to make some money. Plus, it would get them all familiar with their fans, and maybe increase some of their popularity a bit. At any rate, it could be kind of fun to learn more about human culture.

"Alright, 14846 Leopard Lane," The driver calls out. Kanaya was startled a bit, since the man had hardly said two words ever since they had gotten in.

"What an odd name for a street," she muttered to herself. Gamzee shifted in his seat.

"Well, this looks like my stop, motherfuckers," he says, giving his friends a little salute. Just as he was going to open the car door, the shit had to be scared out of him first as a girl slammed herself onto the window.

"Holy shit!" Gamzee exclaimed. The girl just had a big smile on her face, waving excitedly as she opened the door for the troll.

"Oh my Gog, you're actually here!" she squeals, bending over and diving into the car. She gave Gamzee a big hug, nearly squeezing the daylights out of him. The poor troll had trouble trying to hug her correctly, since his horns prevented him from trying to sit up.

"Uh, nice to meet you, motherfucker," He manages to say, his mellow expression returning. The girl immediately let go, stepping away from the taxi to give him some room to get out.

"I'm sorry, I am just so excited. I'm Suki, and I am a huge fan," she says, getting all giggly. She pulled him in for another hug once Gamzee was completely out of the car, and this time he could return it properly.

"Nice to meet you Suki," he turns around, which was difficult with her latched around him. "You motherfuckers have fun with your fans, alright?"

"Are Karkat and Kanaya in there? Holy cow!" Suki squeals as she takes another look in. Karkat was giving her a very disgusted look, like most trolls would when they looked at people, while Kanaya was at least trying to be friendly.

"Nice to meet you Suki. I hope you have a lot of fun with Gamzee," she says sweetly, although it was obvious in her tone that she found Suki to be a tad creepy due to her enthusiastic welcoming for Gamzee.

"Thanks. Good luck with Adam though. He is my friend, and he can take quite a bit of getting used to before you actually warm up to him," Suki informs before turning to Karkat. "Oh, and you have fun with Anya! She's my best friend."

"Oh my Gog, you actually have friends?" Karkat says in astonishment. Kanaya reached back and covered his mouth.

"Thank you very much, but we really have to get going," She said. Suki nods, saying one last quick hello to the both of them before she closed the taxi door. Kanaya pulled her hand away from Karkat's mouth just as the driver started to drive away from Suki's house.

"Well, that was very, um, interesting," Kanaya says, looking forward in her seat. Karkat scoffs once again.

"Interesting? I actually feel sorry for the fucker. Gog, he will be lucky if he even makes it through the year alive.:

* * *

"Come on in. I'm sorry if I was being too abrasive, I'm just so excited," Suki says, practically bouncing on her toes as she led Gamzee inside. The troll shook his head.

"Nah, that is- OOF!" he says as his horns smack against the top of the door. He flinches back a bit, dropping a few of his horns in the process. They honked as they hit the ground.

"Oh my, are you okay?" She asks. Gamzee nods, smiling as he ducked before walking in.

"I'm totally fine, motherfucker," he says calmly, as if nothing had happened. Suki giggled a bit, taking a few steps further inside her house.

"Where should I put my stuff?" Gamzee asks, looking around. Suki turns back around shrugging.

"You can just put it right there. I can take it to the guest room la...ter..." she trails off as there was a sudden banging sound. Gamzee literally just threw all of his stuff right there in the middle of the foyer. This included one large suitcase, a large bag that honked as it landed, and a unicycle.

"Wait, I actually need that bag," Gamzee muttered as he picked up the honking bag. Suki blinked a few times, just quiet for a second.

"... The living room is right over here," She continued finally, turning around and leading the troll through. Gamzee looks around the place, taking in the clean(ish) sight of the house. It wasn't incredibly dirty, but enough to make Kanaya begin to fret. He didn't mind though- it was a pretty nice house.

"Sorry if it's messy, but I have this cat that sheds a lot, and my little brother is pretty dirty sometimes too," Suki babbled. Gamzee smiled a bit at the living room. It was a cozy little place, with a pretty big TV and nice decor, which was mostly various paintings and photos on the wall. What caught the juggalo's eye, however, was the pretty big space between the cream colored couch and the leather armchair beside it.

"Who's spot is that right there?" he asks, pointing to the area. It takes Suki a moment to get to what he's pointing to.

"Oh! I didn't notice that when I was turning the furniture back over. Here, can you help me push the armchair-" Once again, she couldn't finish her sentence. Gamzee had taken it upon himself to walk over to the open area, unzipping the back, and turning it over to dump out it's entire contents. This included a gigantic pile of bicycle horns, a few bottles of faygo, and a few wrapped slime pies.

"Oh yeah," he says, turning around and plopping his butt in the horn pile, causing various honks to be heard. "A motherfucker can get used to this." He looks up at Suki, holding a horn in his hand. "Honk."

"... I swear, this is going to be the best year of my life," she says with a big smile on her face. Gamzee just gives her a relaxed smile and kicks back in the pile.

"Honk," he says again, along with his many horns. This would now be the time for him to meet the other members of the family, such as little brother Evan.

"Suki, are you making those honking sounds?" the little boy asks as he walks in the room. At first, he only sees his sister and a few bike horns scattered on the ground. Then, he see's the troll as he slowly rises up again to see who was the other person talking.

"Well hello motherfucker, who the hell are you?" Gamzee asks, although he had a friendly-like expression on his face. Evan's blue eyes widened greatly, staring at the mess of clown make-up Gamzee wore upon his face.

"... _OH MY GOSH IT'S A CLOWN!_" Evan suddenly screeches, screaming his little head off and he darts out of the room and up the stairs. Gamzee had a confused look on his face as he looks at the older sister.

"What the fuck was that about?" he ask. Suki had her brows raised, and she was chewing on the nail of her index finger for a moment before she answered.

"Oh, that's just Evan, my little brother," she says, and then speaks a little more quietly. "Who I forgot was afraid of clowns..."

* * *

**LOL Sorry, but I'm going to cut the chapter off here- if I add Kanaya and Karkat getting to their places it's going to make the chapter waaaaaaay to long for my liking. Next chapter will be all about that, and then we can get to the real fun stuff :D**

**Remember, feedback is always appreciated ~**


	4. Chapter 4

**Now to quickly respond to the anonymous:**

**ravenfeather3: Hey Rebecca :D Glad you love my story!**

**Guest: Well... yes, there is going to be OCXcanon. Most stories I do are often OCXCanon actually. Sorry. Thanks for giving me a shot though :)**

**Anon: Thank you for the review :) I'm glad you like it!**

**And now on with the story:**

* * *

Karkat stumbled grimly out of the taxi. Kanaya had wished him a friendly farewell before the taxi sped off, leaving the cabin quite quickly. The troll was now by himself, with a couple of bags full of things he would need to survive this year with his supposed fan.

_I swear to Gog I will cut her if the sick fuck tries to hug me_, the grumpy troll thinks, having a tight grip on his bag. His trusty sickle was in there just in case, although Hussie had warned him about killing him off in the comic if he did anything to hurt the fan. As much as he hates to admit it, he actually liked being a survivor as of this far in the series, although he would never admit it out loud.

"Hello?" He calls out, knocking on the door. The house, unlike Suki's little two-story, was a one-story log cabin of decent size. It looked nice among the brush of the forest surrounding it, although it still didn't please him.

"Hello!" He calls out again, louder this time. He waited a second.

"OPEN UP YOU FUCKERS," He cries out, raising a fist to slam on the door once again. Unfortunately, the door had opened as he swung, and he ended up punching Anya in her stomach with a tremendous amount of force. The wind was immediately knocked out of her, and she keeled over. Karkat took a step back, watching her with his grey and yellow eyes.

"... So are you the pathetic fan or what?" the troll asks, feeling absolutely no sympathy for the human at all. she manages to meet his gaze, a harsh blue glare, and stepped out of the way to let him in.

"It's about time you opened the fucking door. I was not going to stand out there all day," he grumbled loudly on his way in. Immediately he was face-to-face with Anya's parents. The mother was giving him a nasty glare, her arms folded across her chest. Her dad, however, had an emotionless look on his face. It was quite obvious that they were judging him, already having a dislike for the troll due to the language and rude demeanor. Punching their daughter in the stomach added on quite a bit of hateful tension as well.

"... So where the fuck am I sleeping?" he asks, as if oblivious of their disapproval. Truth was, he didn't give two shits about what they thought of him. After all, they were the ones willing to pay for him.

"Anya, a minute please," the dad says, his voice low and steady. Anya made sure to give him a glare before walking off with her parents into another room. Karkat rolled his eyes and took a seat on the couch, his head resting in his hands.

He was off to the perfect start, ladies and gentlemen.

* * *

On the other hand, Kanaya was just about to finally meet her fan. It didn't take long for her to notice that Adam's house was pretty close to Suki's, and was convinced that the driver had taken the detour to Anya's house to get a few extra bucks. No tip for him, that asshole.

Despite that, Kanaya was just relieved to have finally made it. The grungy little taxi was just not her cup of tea, and she had quite a bit of luggage to haul out from the trunk. In fact, her luggage was the reason why Gamzee and Karkat had to arrive with so little. If she needs to, she can always sew up a few outfits for them if they happen to run out. Fangirls tend to tear the clothing as well.

The first thing Kanaya did was examine the outer interior. It was a cute little house, a lovely little one story with lovely blue paint on the outside. She especially loved the little garden that resided around the house, adding quite a bit of color with their differing hues. She smiled, knowing that this wasn't going to be so bad.

How wrong the rainbow drinker was.

She politely knocked on the door, and waited patiently for a response. Her luggage was piled behind her, and she hoped he was nice enough to help her carry all her bags in. She heard footsteps from inside, and she put on her best smile as the door opened.

"Hello? Oh, it's you," Adam mutters, blowing a piece of hair out of his face. Kanaya's smile falters a bit, a frown coming on at Adam's horrid appearance. Not only was his hair an absolute mess, but wore a tacky, woolly sweater that was inappropriate for the warm weather. It was an odd brown color and looked as if it were falling apart with all the snags hanging off of it. The blue sweatpants he wore with it did not match in any way, and the overall appearance made her want to hurl- and that didn't include the rude manner of how he answered the door.

Still, she kept a smile.

"Are you Adam? It is so nice to meet you," she says sweetly, holding out a hand to greet him with. Adam looked at her hand strangely, and then looked at her face again. He had to admit, she was much prettier then she is in the webcomic, although by the amount of luggage she had behind her, he couldn't help but thing she was one of '_those'_ girls.

"Um, you too, I guess," he says, turning around and walking back inside. He had left the door wide open for her. Kanaya blinked, standing there with her hand still out.

"Right," she mutters, trying to haul her stuff in. What kind of gentlemen didn't help a woman, or lady troll in this case, with her luggage? Humans, sometimes.

Kanaya's jaw dropped a bit as she came inside. Why, the outside was so misleading. Adam's house was a complete mess! Everything was so disorganized and left out everywhere, and the floor was littered with dust balls. The rainbow drinker let out a gasp, shivering at the sight. How could someone with such a lovely yard have such a hideous house?

"Okay, I'm going to be completely honest with you here," Adam says, scratching the back of his head. "I honestly know nothing about your character."

"Hm?" Was all Kanaya said. She was hardly listening until the character part.

"Yeah, my dumb friend, Suki, kinda bought you for me. I'm not even that far in Homestuck nor do I like it that much anyway to get to that point," he says so bluntly. Kanaya stood there, speechless. All of her thoughts about how her fan was going to be basically was thrown into the toilet.

"So, you didn't bid for me?"

"Nope. I'm sorry your year has to be wasted here. I tried to refund you, but I never got an email back about it," he says. Kanaya has never been so offended. It was one thing to think of herself as possibly a gift from his dear friend, in which to possibly make him more interested in Homestuck. But to be thought of as a waste of money, and hoping to be refunded?

The rainbow drinker then decides that she doesn't like the fans very much either.

"Anyway, uh, I'm going back to my game now," he says, turning on his heels and walking out. It wasn't long before loud gun shots were heard, most likely from the so-called game he was playing before the rainbow drinker had arrived.

Kanaya fumed a bit, although she took a moment to take a deep breath and calm herself down. After all, it was only the first day, and Suki had warned her about him being hard to get used to. Still, she couldn't help but feel like she had to blow off a little steam.

She turns to one of her bags, the smallest of them all. Her fingers trace over the heavy red fabric as she searched for the zipper. Once she had found it, she had unzipped the bag, and pulled out her computer. She has to sit on one of her bigger suitcases, since she refused to sit on such a dirty floor. The bigger one you sat only has clothes, so it wouldn't hurt anything to take a quick seat.

* * *

**grimAuxiliatrix **began trolling **carcinoGeneticist**

GA: Although I Hate To Admit Such A Thing To You

GA: You Were Absolutely Right About These Fans. If You Could Call Mine That Anyway.

CG: HAHAHA.

CG: I ONLY LAUGH BECAUSE OF HOW FUCKING HILARIOUS IT IS TO SEE ONE OF YOU ADMIT THAT THIS IDEA WAS HORRIBLE.

CG: HORRIBLE LIKE THE STUPID FANS WE GOT STUCK WITH FOR A WHOLE FUCKING YEAR.

CG: AND AFTER TRYING SO HARD TO CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE, YOU END UP COMING BACK TO ME WITH A LITTLE SOB STORY ABOUT HOW RIGHT I WAS.

CG: ONCE AGAIN, FUCKING HA.

GA: I Knew I Would Get A Response Like This.

GA: But Nothing Like That Can Bother Me Right Now, Unlike This Filthy Hive Adam Owns.

CG: HOLY SHIT IS HE A DISGUSTING PERV LIKE I PREDICTED?

GA: He Is A Teenager, So No.

GA: But He Is A Slob, And His Fashion Sense Is Terrible.

CG: SOUNDS LIKE PAIN IN THE ASS.

GA: Your Sarcasm Is Noted.

CG: IT'S NOT LIKE I'M OFF TO SUCH A GREAT START EITHER. THE HUMAN'S PARENTS ALREADY FUCKING HATE ME.

GA: What Have You Done To Set Them Off?

GA: Already, I Mean.

CG: 'ALREADY?' WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN BY THAT.

CG: YOU KNOW WHAT, NEVERMIND.

CG: HELL IF I KNOW WHY THEY HATE ME. IT COULD BE BECAUSE I PUNCHED THEIR KID IN THE STOMACH AS SOON AS SHE OPENED THE FUCKING DOOR.

GA: Punching Her In The Stomach? That's Pretty Extreme.

CG: IT WASN'T ON PURPOSE. I WAS IN MID-KNOCK WHEN THE STUPID FUCK FINALLY OPENED THE DOOR.

GA: So It Wasn't Because Of Your Vulgar Mouth?

CG: LIKE HELL IF THEY CARE ABOUT THAT.

GA: I See.

GA: My Supposed Fan Apparently Isn't Even A Fan.

CG: WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT?

GA: After I Had Arrived, He Pretty Much Told Me That He Wasn't Even The One To Even Bid On Me, And That It Was That Suki Human Who Did.

GA: For A Moment I Was Thinking I Was Possibly A Gift Of Some Sort, Maybe To Get Him Interested.

GA: But It Turned Out That He Doesn't Really Care For Me, And Actually tried To Refund Me.

CG: ...

GA: It Was Heartbreaking To Say The Least. I Was Looking Forward To Connecting With A True Fan Of Mine.

CG: ...

GA: Why Are You So Quiet All Of A Sudden?

CG: KANAYA, DID YOU EVEN LOOK OVER WHAT YOU WERE TYPING?

GA: What Do You Mean?

CG: GO BACK, AND READ OVER THE LINE ABOUT 'GETTING HIM INTERESTED' AGAIN.

GA: ...

GA: I Did Not Mean For It To Come Out That Way.

CG: I REALLY HOPE IT WASN'T.

GA: I Really Hope Gamzee, Or Any Other Troll For That Matter, Is Having More Fun Then We Are.

**grimAuxiliatrix **ceased trolling **carcinoGeneticist**

* * *

**LOL I'm sorry, but that's the introductions for now :D Sorry it's been a while since I last updated. I was really lazy about getting this chapter out :P These are some wonderful first impressions, aren't they?**

**I hope you enjoyed it, to say the least. Sorry if the pesterlog part was a bit wonky- those are much harder to write then you think. I know i wasn't "Hussie Level" but I hope I did alright for it!**

**Anyway, I do have a poll on my page, and I would advise you to please take it :) I am so curious. **

**Feedback is always appreciated. **


	5. Chapter 5

**Now to quickly respond to the anonymous:**

**R. B: YES! I love getting fan art just as much as I get reviews :D Just make sure you give me a link, and I will favorite it on DA :D thank you for reviewing and I hope you continue to enjoy the story~**

**random person 3: lol the Eridan thing was just a whole joke. I honestly don't like him, but that's just my opinion. Thanks for reviewing!**

**Now to continue on~**

* * *

"So, what are we going to do first, motherfucker?" Gamzee asked. He was quite cozy within his little horn pile, although he knew that he and his fan were going to have to do something. After all, that's why this motherfucker was there. Suki, of course, had a blank face.

"I honestly have no idea," she answered. To be very honest, she hadn't thought of anything to do on the first day when Gamzee would arrive. She had been too focused on getting the house to look decent and to avoid getting killed by her friends to even plan anything.

"I'm sorry, I should have planned this better," she says, already getting frustrated with herself and her lack of planning skills. Gamzee, noticing that right away, picks up one of the bottles of faygo on the ground and gingerly tosses it t her. Suki manages to catch it, despite her lack of coordination skills.

"Relax, man. We have all the time in the world to find something to do," he says, sinking into the pile a bit. "Just sit down, slam a faygo, and just relax."

"... Okay," she chirps, sounding quite cheerful. He was right- there was no point in worrying right now. After all, there was going to be much to do throughout the year.

She takes a seat on the arm chair next to Gamzee's horn pile, kicking her feet up and throwing them over the side- of course, away from Gamzee. She was careful opening the bottle of faygo, although with the way it was bubbling she had to let it set for a minute unless she wanted a mess.

Then, the awkward silence sets in. Although the TV was on and playing some random show, neither one of them spoke for a minute. Now for Gamzee, this was okay. He didn't mind silence too much. Suki, on the other hand, couldn't stand it.

"... So, like, how do you do your costume and stuff?" She asks, looking down. Gamzee looks up, his brows raised while his eyes remain lidded.

"Huh?"

"Okay, I know you aren't supposed to speak out of character or anything, but I just _have _to know," she exclaims. "I'm into a lot of cosplaying and stuff, although my costumes always seem inaccurate. Like, I look at a lot of references and stuff, but they never come out perfect. I mean, yeah, I do get a little lazy sometimes, but it shouldn't be that bad..."

"Uh..." It was Gamzee's only response as she babbled. Now, being a troll and all, he wasn't exactly familiar with cosplaying very much. Sure, he had been told a little about it when Hussie tried to explain it to him, but at the time he was as high as fuck, and his mind couldn't quite grasp the concept.

"I don't mean to interrupt, but, what is cosplay?" Gamzee cuts in. Suki stopped her rambling, and smiled.

"Wow, even when I want advice you aren't willing to break character! I like that," she says. Gamzee scratches his chin.

"Thanks motherfucker, I guess," he shrugs. "Although I have no idea what you are talking about."

"Here, just hang on here a second," Suki says, getting up off of the armchair. "I need to put a costume on first, and then I can tell you about it." Of course, it was a little weird to her that she was going to explain cosplay to this guy, but if he was going to stick to his character like this, there was not harm in it, right?

She held out a finger to him, a symbol of the "just one minute" thing before she takes off. Gamzee watches as she disappears, and then turns his attention back to the TV. Some sort of cartoon was on, because even though the girl was a grown ass teenager, she loved to watch cartoons.

"Whoa," he says, the bright colors flashing against his face. Colors were beautiful to watch, just like life and it's beauty. Pretty soon he is staring out into space, his eyes lidding to the point to where it was almost as if he was falling asleep.

On the other hand, we have little Evan. The blonde headed boy was hiding out in the kitchen, peering out from behind the counter. He was staring at Gamzee, watching the juggalo dozing off. No one was really sure why this little boy is terrified of clowns. All we know is that he is, and there is nothing we can do about it.

_And I refuse to let this clown stay here,_ Evan thinks bitterly, picking up the bucket he had laying out beside him. Did we ever mention that this kid likes to wear buckets on his head when he is about to attack? He and his friends do it all the time, and... well, this isn't relevant to the story very much, so let's just move on.

Evan decides to do a weird army crawl across the kitchen floor, holding only a giant Nerf gun with him since it was typical for children to think that those foam darts can take out intruders. Even so, he carried out his plan.

Now would be the time to point out the horns that were scattered all around the room. Some had bounced away when Gamzee had dumped them all out of his bag. Evan had to be careful if he was ever going to finish out his mission on destroying the clown- and by destroy we mean shoot foam at him. The army crawl was successful so far, and he was getting at a good distance. Evan had little drops of sweat forming underneath his bucket helmet, and he was shaking a bit as he got closer to the juggalo. Again, we don't know why he is afraid of clowns, but this kid was literally about to shit his pants over this.

And then... the worst possible case happens when Evan, for just one moment, forgets to be careful of where he puts he elbow in his crawls, and accidentally give a big squeeze on one of the many horns.

_HONK._

Evan lets out a screech by the sudden sound, and he sits upright immediately. Gamzee's eyes shot up and his whole body jerks as he also screams, the other horns in the pile also getting set off by the troll's own movements. Gamzee's sudden panic causes Evan to scream louder, to the point where he got up and sprinted away as fast as he could, his bucket helmet flying off of his head and hitting the carpeted ground, rolling over a bit towards the troll. Gamzee had already gotten over the scare, and was now staring at the bucket. He blinked a few times, a brow raised. He had almost missed the stampeding sounds of Suki as she ran back downstairs into the living room, her eyes wide.

"What just happened? I heard screaming, is everyone okay?" She panicked. While she was upstairs she had been putting on one of her cosplays, and was now half-dressed as Vriska, which was pretty much the shirt and jacket, and a half-placed black wig. Gamzee nudged the bucket away, looking up at the fan.

"I think the little motherfucker wanted to fuck me," he says plainly.

Needless to say, Suki was very disturbed by that comment.

"... Okay then," she says.

"Look, as much as I don't like to disappoint, tell the little motherfucker that I'm not interested, will you bro?" Gamzee says nonchalantly. He looked over the shirt. "Whoa, are you transforming into Vriska? That's wicked, man."

* * *

Kanaya tapped her foot impatiently, her arms folded over one another. Her eyes glared at Adam, who was currently slumped down on the rugged couch. His hair was matted in all directions, and he had an odd headpiece on his head. His fingers danced alone the controller he had in his hand, and the lights of the screen reflected across his freckled face in the dark room.

"Dude, what the hell are you doing? I said guard the flag, GUARD THE FLAG!" He was screaming, suddenly sitting forward. Gunshots started to go wild, the gun on the screen firing everywhere. Kanaya raised a brow, confused on what this game was. It was nothing she had ever seen before, and certainly not something Vriska had ever shown her.

"HEY! Stop stealing my kills, faggot!" he screamed again. Kanaya mustered a small "Ahem."

"Unbelievable," he growls, throwing his hands up as he was sniped. On the game, of course.

"Ahem," she says much louder this time. Adam still paid no attention to her as he picked up his controller again. Kanaya finally just gave up, rolling her eyes as she went back to the foyer. All she wanted to know was where she was going to be sleeping so she could go ahead and unpack, but alas, she obviously wasn't going to get that information. With a sigh, she decided to go ahead and get her computer back out, and began to pester a few chums.

**grimAuxiliatrix [GA]** began trolling **arachnidsGrip [AG]**

GA: Vriska Are You There

AG: Oh my God, what do you want fussyfangs?

AG: I am very 8usy right now with this dumbass of a fan I got stuck with.

GA: I Assume You Arent Having Fun With Yours Either

AG: This guy is the 8iggest loser I have ever met. All he ever does is f8int and other weird shit.

GA: Thats Not So Bad I Guess

AG: No, it isn't 8ad. It's a8solutely horri8le. I can't have any fun with a guy who is a 8igger loser then Tavros.

AG: Why are you 8othering me right now anyway? Is yours some 8ig loser too or something?

GA: If You Want To Put It That Way

GA: He Is More Rude Then Anything

AG: Rude huh? May8e he knew exactly how to get under your skin. Haha.

GA: As Much As I Would Like To Believe That But No

GA: He Is The Exact Opposite Of A Gentlemen And Has The Worst Fashion Sense I Have Ever Seen

GA: His House Is A Mess And I Dont Know Where I Am Supposed To Stay Because He Would Rather Shoot At Virtual People Then At Least Give Me A Tour

AG: Wow. Sounds like your worst nightmare.

AG: Now, if you are done, I have to go, 8ecause this guy is 8othering me again.

AG: 8ut you shouldn't let some loser walk all over you. You should show that dickhead how it's done. ::::P

**grimAuxiliatrix [GA]** ceased trolling **arachnidsGrip [AG]**

Kanaya sighed, a little disappointing that the conversation couldn't last any longer. At least she and Karkat weren't the only ones with problems.

However, she decided to take those last few words her moirail said into consideration though. Even though he was rude, there was no point in pouting about it. It was final, she was going to do something about this!

That is, until, she got an unwanted pester.

**caligulasAquarium** **[CA] **began trolling **grimAuxiliatrix [GA]**

CA: kan i demand an explanation at once

GA: An Explanation Of What Exactly

CA: wwhere the hell is evveryone i am here all alone and no one else wwill let me pester them

GA: We Are All With Our Fans Remember

GA: The Contest Hussie Had Where He Bid Us Off

CA: wwhat

CA: are wwe all supposed to leavve different days or something

CA: wwhy havven't i gone anywwhere

GA: You Werent Even Put Up For The Bidding

CA: wwhat do you mean i wwasnt put up for the bidding

CA: kan hello

CA: fuckin tell me wwhat is going on is this some kind of cruel joke of some sort hello

Kanaya had no time for this crap. Rather then cease the trolling she just got up and left, hoping that Eridan would eventually get bored and leave her alone.

The rainbow drinker struts her way into the living room once again, and rather then stand in the entrance in, she walked all until she was standing in front of the screen. Adam immediately began spazzing out, hitting random buttons on his controller as he tried to look around her.

"What the hell are you doing? Move!" he then lets out a cry of anguish. "And now I am dead. Do you have any idea what you just did? That was the biggest kill streak I ever-"

"Look Adam, I understand that I am not wanted here, but I have no other choice," Kanaya begins. Adam's black brows furrow. The rainbow drinker continues.

"I would just like to know where I will be sleeping, and then I can be out of your way the rest of the day," She says clearly, still keeping her polite demeanor. She hoped that maybe it would get through his thick skull, and maybe he would want to be more cooperative.

Again, she was wrong.

"Okay, look here Missy," he starts, getting up off of the couch. "I understand that this is something you have to do, but this is my house, and I don't have to show you anything.'

"Oh really?"

"Yes. Now, I am very busy with my game right now, so if you could just, maybe, _move_, that would be great," he says, his tone faltering slightly. Adam wasn't normally so rude, especially not with a girl, but that kill streak was very important and hard to get, and there was no way he was going to be nice to her after she cost him such a thing.

Kanaya, however, was going to have none of that. She tolerated quite a bit, especially when it came to such rudeness- after all, she had to deal with Vriska and Eridan quite a bit on a daily basis.

"What are you doing?" Adam asks, watching as Kanaya pulled a tube of lipstick from her skirt pocket. She careful took the top off, revealing the sticky lip stuff underneath.

"I don't normally do such things, but I have no other choice right now," she says. Adam was about to make a smart remark about make-up, but not before his eyes watch as the lipstick suddenly turns into a large chainsaw, to which Kanaya held proudly. She gives him a sweet smile, just about ready to turn it on.

"The basement is where you will be staying. The door is past the foyer and the first door on your left. Then you just go downstairs, and oh God please don't kill me," Adam sang like a little bird, his voice faltering uncontrollably as he became sweaty underneath his sweater. Kanaya nods.

"Thank you so much Adam, and like I promised, I will be out of your hair the rest of the day," she says kindly, her chainsaw turning back into the lipstick. Kanaya wasn't the one to ever threaten another person like that, but if that was the only way she was going to get Adam to tell her anything, she was willing to make an exception.

In conclusion to the little act, she simply puts the lipstick away and grabs her stuff, leaving Adam in the living room with his soiled underpants.

* * *

While Gamzee was given buckets and Kanaya was threatening Adam, Karkat still wasn't off to a fantastic start. Anya's parents had blamed her for everything about him, although none of it was actually her fault. Her parents often yelled at her for stuff that wasn't her fault though.

Then they had the nerve to come out try to tell Karkat the rules of the house, to which he simply replied:

"I don't have to fucking follow anything!"

And they simple replied;

"What did you just say?!"

So, they sent him to his room- and by that we mean Anya's.

"Stupid fucks," he growls under his breath, pouting on the bed. He shouldn't have to be in the room at all, although after a long banter of arguing he was simply forced in there by the grump Anya called her dad. He was incredibly annoyed that he was being told what to do- humans had no right to tell him anything! He should just walk out of that room right now just to rub it in their faces that he could do as he pleased.

At least, he would have if someone wasn't trying to pester him.

"For the love of fuck..." he growled, picking up his little computer to answer his chum.

**terminallyCaprious [TC] **began trolling **carcinoGeneticist [CG]**

CG: WHAT IN THE ALMIGHTY TAINTCHAFTING FUCK DO YOU WANT?

TC: nOt A sInGlE tHiNg BrO.

CT: OtHeR tHeN cHeCkInG oN mY mOtHeRfUcKiNg FrIeNd MaN.

TC: GAMZEE I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR YOUR SHIT RIGHT NOW.

CG: I AM TRYING TO THING OF WAYS TO PISS OFF THIS FUCKS CALLED PARENTS.

TC: nOw, WhY aNd TrY aNd Do SoMeThInG lIkE tHaT mAn?

CG: THE ANNOYING FUCKS SENT ME TO MY ROOM.

CG: I MEAN ANYA'S ROOM.

CG: I MEAN THE IDIOTIC FAN'S ROOM.

CG: GOD DAMMIT.

TC: yOu NeEd To ChIlL oUt, My InVeRtEbRoThEr.

CG: NO, I WILL NOT CHILL OUT. I WILL DO THE OPPOSITE OF CHILL OUT.

CG: THESE MORONIC FUCKS THINK THEY CAN TELL ME WHAT TO DO, BUT THEY ARE WRONG!

TC: tHaTs TrUe MaN. BuT, wHy AnD tRy To PiSs ThE mOtHeRfUcKeRs OfF mAn?

TC: ThAt JuSt IsNt FuCkInG cOoL.

CG: SERIOUSLY, IS THERE SOME REASON YOU ARE BOTHERING ME RIGHT NOW?

CG: BECAUSE, LIKE I CLEARLY STATED ALREADY, I DON'T GAVE TIME FOR YOUR SHIT RIGHT NOW.

TC: nO MaN. I'm JuSt WaItInG tO SeE wHo My FaN wIlL tUrN iNtO nOw.

CG: WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN BY THAT?

TC: tHiS fAn HeRe Is MaGiCaL mAn.

TC: lIkE, sHe HaS tHiS tHiNg WhErE sHe CoSpLaYs, AnD sHe TuRnS iNtO oThEr MoThErFuCkInG tRoLlS aNd StUfF.

TC: OnE mInUtE ShE wAs A HaLf vRiSkA, ThEn ShE wAs A wHoLe VrIsKa tHe NeXt, aNd tHeN sHe WaS sUkI aGaIn AfTeR tHaT.

TC: iT bLeW mY mOtHeRfUcKiNg MiNd MaN.

CG: OH MY GOD YOU ARE AS RETARDED AS SHE IS.

CG: SHE'S ONE OF THOSE CREEPY ASS COSPLAYERS, WHO DRESS UP LIKE US AND TRIES TO ACT LIKE A RETARDED VERSION OF US FOR HER AMUSEMENT.

CG: I SWEAR, IT'S LIKE YOU NEVER LISTEN TO ANYTHING THAT IS SAID TO YOU.

TC: Yo MaN, tHiS iS mOtHeRfUcKiNg SiCk. ShE lOoKs LiKe Me NoW.

CG: FOR THE LOVE OF FUCK I HAVE TO GO, DOUCHEBAG.

TC: aLrIgHt, LaTer mAn. :O)

TC: hOnK.

**terminallyCaprious [TC] **ceased trolling **carcinoGeneticist [CG]**

Karkat felt like hitting his head on the computer screen. Seriously, what has he done to deserve such a horrible best friend? Well, he had no time to wonder about it right now, because he hated being cooped up in this tiny room. It was absolutely littered with drawings that Anya had made. Everywhere he stepped he would crinkle up yet another paper, and it was starting to annoy him.

"God, is it so hard to pick up every once in a fucking while?" he growls, kicking the papers aside. It was sad, because they were very lovely.

Just as he was leaving, he spots something important. Just as he was about to open the door, his gaze drifted downward. A blue folder stuck out from underneath a dresser, almost as if begging him to come and take a look. Karkat could care less about that folder, but like these things usually do, it just beckons you until you take a peek.

And so he did. Karkat took a peek within the folder, his eyes widening and his jaw dropping at the sight. He immediately shuts it with a ton of force, his cheeks tinted bright red.

This. Was. The. Final. Straw.

"What the FUCK is this?" Karkat roars loudly as he came storming out of the room. The folder was tucked under his arm, and man was he angry. Anya and her parents jumped, all three of them looking at Karkat in shock as he stormed in.

"I thought we said-"

"Put a sock in it, you stupid douche," Karkat cuts off the father immediately, and then proceeds to shove the folder in Anya's face. The girl's eyes widened, her jaw dropping.

"W-What are you doing with that?"

"You should be ASHAMED of yourself! What the fuck is wrong with you?" He growls, opening it up. Anya lunged forward, trying to stop him, but he simply turned and got out of the way, although his eye contact never broke.

"And you have the audacity to leave it out in the open, like 'OH LOOK AT ME, I'M JUST A BIG PILE OF PORN PLEASE TAKE A LOOK'," Karkat freaks, his hands gripping the papers and tossing them around.

"_NO!" _Anya screams, scrambling to gather up all of the papers as quickly as she could. Unfortunately, she was too late, as her parents had got hold of some of the falling papers. Their expressions were horrified, and even a tad flushed.

"Oh my God, I knew I was going to get stuck with the biggest creep on the planet! I swear, if I catch you trying to molest me in the middle of the night I will fucking-" And then Karkat lets out a loud shriek as Anya lunged, pulling him to the ground for a proper beating.

This is certainly going to be an interesting year.

* * *

**ugh, this chapter took FOREVER. But I was having so much fun I couldn't help myself xD**

**Anyway, I hope you don't mind me adding a few pesterlog chats with the other trolls along the way. I mean, I find that it would make the story more believable since they are all kinda in this together, you know?**

**Oh yeah, and PLEASE vote on my poll! I am very curious, and I plan to do something with it for later in the story :D**

**Anyway... feedback is always appreciated!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Now to quickly respond to the anonymous:**

**The Zoster: Thank you, i'm glad you are enjoying the story :D**

**Now to continue on~**

* * *

After the terribly awkward encounters, night had fallen quickly upon the trolls and the teenagers. Unfortunately, room arrangements weren't exactly perfect either, as Kanaya and Karkat didn't get to have their own guest rooms.

Karkat, for one, had to share a room with Anya- with the doors open for obvious reasons, although there were no buckets inside the room. There was only one bed in there, and it was much to small for two people to share. It ended up with Karkat forcibly taking the bed, while poor Anya was forced to sleep on the floor. Thankfully, she was able to retreat to the couch in the living room.

Kanaya's was much more awkward though. As it turns out, Adam has an older brother, who was currently away at college at the moment. Before then, Adam and his brother had to share a room, and the second bed was never moved after the older one had left. Of course, this was the only other bed in the house, meaning that it was the only place Kanaya could sleep if she wanted proper bedding, even if it meant Adam had to sleep with a cautious eye open.

Gamzee, however, was a lucky motherfucker. Suki's house had an extra bedroom, which like Adam in a way, belonged to an older sibling. Sadly, since this older sibling, who was also currently away at college, was a sister rather then a brother, so the room was a bit girly. Gamzee didn't care though- it was still a nice room, despite the pink walls.

Since it was only Tuesday that week, and not a weekend like we had you all believe, the fans and Adam had to be up bright and early for school. This was going to be the troll's first time at the house alone, although the parents didn't seem to like it that way.

Unfortunately, Suki's mother was currently the only parent and had to work, and with her eldest away and her other two at school, she had to pray that Gamzee wouldn't try and steal anything. Not that he would, anyway.

Speaking of Gamzee, the troll was currently snoozing the daylight away. Since Suki never got to tell her troll buddy good-bye before taking off for school, she had no other choice but to leave a note beside the bed, since she didn't want to wake him up. She only drew a ':O)' on the folded paper, as a way to indicate for him to read the note. She thought it was funny, since you know, who the guy was and all.

Of course, she was surprised to see that Gamzee had washed the clown make-up off, but his face still remained gray. Like her other friends, Suki still had no idea about Gamzee actually being a real troll quite yet, and thought naively that it was a guy who acted the role of the juggalo. She thought it was odd, yet very dedicated, that the guy would still keep the gray paint on in his sleep.

Still, she left the note and carried on without another thought except how cute Gamzee looked when he wasn't wearing clown make-up. Of course, what kind of Gamzee fangirl didn't think the same thing, you know?

* * *

Kanaya, despite her horrid encounter with Adam yesterday, managed to get a good night's sleep. Surely, it was very awkward sleeping in the same room as the boy, especially since all his clothes were in there. She hoped he had the decency to at least get dressed elsewhere- not that she was awake to see, anyway.

Mornings were often slow, yet very peaceful for the young rainbow drinker. Of course, if she was still at home where Hussie and the other trolls lived, it would be much more enjoyable. The fact that she was in such a cluttered and dirty environment, she couldn't bring herself to enjoy the mornings as much. Her urge to clean hadn't left since the moment she had walked in the door, and gosh darn it if she didn't do it soon, she was going to go insane.

It was then when she had decided that breakfast was going to have to wait- she had a lot of work to do if she was going to make this place livable.

* * *

Karkat wasn't having a good morning at all. Not only did he get the same rude awakening from the alarm in Anya's room, but was also forced to get dressed and ready to go as well. The only problem was that he wasn't even going anywhere, since he was going to stay at the house all day anyway. Right now, with bags underneath his eyes, he just sat there on the couch, his laptop in his lap. Anya's father had also decided that was going to take the next couple of days off from work, just to keep an eye on the troll. This meant that he was sitting in the chair across from Karkat's seat, and kept a close eye on him, despite the open newspaper in his hands.

Needless to say, this annoyed Karkat to a whole new level. He did not come all this way to be babysat by some human, and if he wasn't so tired, he sure as hell would be throwing a tantrum right now. But alas, the most he could do would be to pester his chums. Unfortunately, it was too early for any of them to be up right now. Karkat eventually gave up, folding his arms and grumbling to himself in his seat. He glared over at Anya's father, who was still keeping a close eye on him.

"Do you fucking mind? You're creeping me out," he muttered. Anya's father slammed his newspaper down.

"What did you just say?"

"I said 'Fuck,' now get over it!"

Unfortunately for him, Anya's father would not get over it, as Karkat was locked in Anya's room with no dessert for a week. We don't know if he actually has the authority to do that, but being the man he was, Anya's father did.

* * *

Suki hummed to herself, gingerly tossing books in and out of her locker and into her bag, whistling every now and then to her little tune. Despite the weird looks she was getting, she continued to move a bit, doing a little dance to her locker. It was unknown what song she was thinking about, but it didn't really matter. What mattered were the two friends of hers that were storming up to her, fuming beyond belief.

Suki turned around and smiled. "Hey, you two! How are you guys his morning?" Despite her cheery greeting, Anya and Adam kept their frowns. Suki's toothy grin started to disappear.

"I guess you guys are still mad, huh?" she asked. They both nod. "Oh come on, they can't be that bad, can they?"

"I got grounded because he kept saying 'fuck,' _and _started to flaunt my blue folder around in front of my parents," Anya growled, her glare hard and terrifying. Adam had no idea what the blue folder was, but Suki did, and her face was bright red.

"Oh," she said, pursing her lips as she looked down for a moment. Adam scoffs.

"If you think that is bad," he starts. "That Kanaya chick pulled a _fucking chainsaw_ on me, and ruined my kill streak on Black Ops!"

"Wait, she had a chainsaw?" Suki began to grin. "Whoa, did it change from a tube of lipstick?"

"Yes it- wait, did you _know _about the chainsaw? Oh my GOD are you trying to get me killed?" Adam started to freak, his hands running down his face, pulling at the skin slightly. Suki wasn't listening, turning to Anya_._

"Wow, I wonder where she got something like that! Do you think I should buy one online?" She asked Anya. Anya gave her a strained smile.

"I hope so. Then I can get one, and kill you with it."

"Dude... that isn't even cool," Suki says, using her best Strider impression. "I mean seriously, it was the first day. At least try and give them a chance."

"Yes, because who wouldn't be happy to have some freak in a troll costume live at your house for a whole fucking year," Anya growls.

"Aw, see? He's already rubbing off on you," Suki laughs, just before taking off for the nearest teacher. She wasn't ready to die that morning.

But even so, it was going to be a long day of school.

* * *

The day dragged on kinda slowly from there. Gamzee ended up waking up around two thirty in the afternoon, which was pretty late, even for him. Not that he minded, since he was now well rested. He had gotten the note first thing, which was pretty much just Suki telling him when she would be home and to help himself to anything in the house. The motherfucker had woken up pretty hungry, so just about anything sounded good to him right now.

He saunters into the kitchen, a hand holding his stomach. A thin trail of dried drool was still stuck on his chin, and his eyes were a tad droopier then usual. His white clown make-up hadn't been put on yet, although he was planning to do it soon. With a slight rub on his stomach with his one hand, the other reaches forward to the refrigerator handle, or as Gamzee calls it, the "Freezer box of Miracles."

The troll smiled, his eyes settling on one of the finely wrapped sopor slime pies that resided within. He figured it would be a good way to start the day, and he carefully took it out. Although it wouldn't be warm like it was when it came out of the oven, it would still hold that miraculous, yet brain-killing taste that the slime always had. All he needed now was a fork.

A few minutes later, Gamzee was finally situated in the living room, the bright green pie on his lap. It took a minute, but he managed to find the forks, meaning it was finally time for him to enjoy his breakfast, if you wanted to call it that anyway.

Now, this would be around the time when Evan would get home. Since he was only in elementary school, he started the day just a little earlier then his sister, and would get home a lot sooner. Although he would be home alone for just a half hour, he was a smart kid and knew how to watch himself for a short while. Although he was always excited to get off the bus and run inside, he was hesitant, especially knowing that the clown was still in his house.

He sneaked inside carefully, being as quiet as he could. His hazel colored eyes were wide as he looked around, expecting Gamzee to jump out of at any corner. However, he was surprised to see Gamzee in the living room, eating a pie with no trace of make-up on. The troll was clearly zoned out, his head drifting away as he savored the slimy taste. Evan no longer had a scared look, but now had a look of confusion and curiosity. His head tilted to the side as he walked into the living room. Gamzee looked over, a content smile on his face.

"What's up, motherfucker," he says smoothly, chilling back on the couch cushions.

"Why isn't your face white?" Evan asks. Gamzee shrugged.

"I haven't put it on yet, man. I just came down, here to enjoy the slime," he says, sighing a bit. He had a huge grin, enjoying the pretty pictures that moved on the TV screen.

"Haven't put it on? Does that mean..." Evan drifts off. Gamzee nods.

"Just make-up, little bro," the troll states, turning his head. Evan nods, his eyes carefully eyeing the candy corn horns on Gamzee's head.

"Well, if you aren't a clown, then what are you?" he asked. Gamzee chuckled, kicking his feet up on the table.

"I'm a motherfucking troll, man. Did your sis tell you anything, little bro?"

"Not really. All I heard was that she bought a strange man online, and mommy that it was some kind of rapist guy or something, although I think she has changed her mind now since she hasn't called 911 yet since you have arrived," Evan babbled. He seemed to be much more relaxed, especially after he learned that Gamzee isn't a real clown. Although he was still a bit hesitant about the horns, he felt much more confident about them being fake as well.

"Are your horns fake too?" he asked, taking a step closer, tossing his backpack aside finally. Gamzee chuckled again, shaking his head.

"No man, these little things are as real as fucking miracles," Gamzee said, leaning forward. His grey hand glided across the carpet, picking up one of the horns off of the ground.

"Honk," he said, giving the black ball part of it a good squeeze. Evan giggled a bit, shaking his head.

"I wasn't talking about those. I meant the horns on your head," he pointed at the candy colored horns. Gamzee makes an "oh" sound.

"Those are motherfucking real too," he says coolly. Evan gave him a suspicious stare.

"No they aren't, and I can prove it," he says, beaming with confidence. Gamzee smirks, placing his pie on the coffee table.

"Alright then, motherfucker, come here give 'em a good pull."

"Fine," Evan puffed out his cheeks, and he stormed over, grabbed the large horns, and put all his strength into pulling them off.

They didn't budge even a bit.

* * *

Suki: Anya

Suki: Anya

Suki: Anyaaaaa

Suki: BITCH ANSWER ME

Suki: Anyaaaaaaaaaaaa

The girl let out a large huff of annoyance as she sent the last message just before stuffing her phone in her pocket. Neither Adam or Anya talked to her very much that day, especially at lunch. It was plainly obvious that they were mad at her, and she was trying to get them to speak to her so she could find some way to make it up. Unfortunately, Anya wasn't answering her texts, and she didn't even have Adam's cell phone number ever since he got a new one. She sighed sadly, deciding to give up and just go hang out with Gamzee for a while. After all, that's why she bid on him.

But even now, she was starting to doubt the decision. Sure, it was a seriously cool idea to be able to hang out with your favorite troll for an _entire _year, but at the same time... it's a troll cosplayer staying in your house for an _entire _year. She shook her head of those thoughts- she was determined to stay optimistic about this, despite Anya and Adam's brash thoughts about it.

After a few more houses, Suki finally made it home. Although her mother drove her to school every morning, Suki had to walk home everyday since her mother would still be at work for a few more hours. Thankfully it wasn't a long distance, or at least long enough for her lazy ass to loathe it.

Upon arriving to the door, however, she had to jump back before it swung open, with Evan running out to grab her right leg.

"Don't go in there, there's a monster!" He wails, shaking violently as his chewed-on nails found a way to claw into her skin. Suki tries to shake him off.

"For the last time Evan, Gamzee is not a clown-"

"I know! I saw that, but now I think he's a monster!'

"You mean a troll. It's part of the get-up."

"N-no! I pulled on his horns, and they didn't move, and then when I saw him smiling about it, his teeth were all sharp, and then I screamed and-"

"Hey motherfucker, where have you been sis?" Gamzee chirps as he walks up to the door, still dressed in his pajamas, although he was now wearing his clown make-up. It should also be noted that a fork was also sticking out of his left shoulder.

"Hi- is that a fork in your arm?!" Suki screeched. Evan had already taken off, his screams fading away into the wind. She wanted to scream and chase after him, but her attention was on the silverware in Gamzee's forearm.

"Did Evan do that?" she asked.

"I don't think the motherfucker meant to. He got freaked out over something, and it was just some reflexes. No problem at all," Gamzee says, shrugging as if it didn't bother him one bit. Suki grabbed fistfuls of her hair and tugged.

"I am so sorry. I don't know what is wrong with him, he never does something like this! Oh my God, I can't believe he was even strong enough to penetrate the skin-"

"Relax sis, it's cool," Gamzee says, cutting her off. He did wince, however, when Suki grabbed hold of the fork's handle.

"No, no this is _not _okay! For the love of everything, please don't sue us, I can totally treat this! All it needs is a little tug," Suki says, putting her other hand on his clothed chest for support. Her cheeks flush a bit at her action, although she pretends it doesn't bother her as she prepares to pull it out.

"It's no problem at all. The little motherfucker isn't- OH SHIT!" Gamzee cries when the fork is yanked out. Drops of his indigo blood immediately start to drip out of the small wound, although it hurts for only a second since it wasn't too far in. Suki stands proudly, holding the fork in her hand.

"Got it! Were you eating something purple though? Because this is covered in it," she says, bringing it closer to her face. Immediately, she frowns, noticing that there wasn't a drop of red on it.

"Oh man, that stung like a motherfucking bitch," Gamzee says, covering the bleeding area with his other hand. "It feels fine now, though."

"Move your hand," Suki says out of no where, giving him a suspicious look. Gamzee raised a brow, but shrugged. He removed his hand, revealing the small little beads of clotting blood. Suki leaned forward, her mouth parted open slightly when she sees the indigo variant. As a Gamzee cosplayer herself, she would know the color anywhere.

"Your blood... why is it indigo?" She asks rhetorically.

"I dunno. I was born that way, and you know, it was made like that. It's kinda like a miracle, although blood is only a color, you know?" Gamzee says nonchalantly. Suki pokes one of the beads of blood, taking a closer look on it on her own finger. No matter what, there was no way someone could make their blood that color- not even the most accurate cosplayer could ever pull something off like that. She looks up at Gamzee's face, and then she starts to notice the smaller things. The yellow around his indigo colored irises- although she was sure there were contacts that could do such things, but the teeth? His teeth poked out of his painted lips, sharp and almost too realistic for plastic fakes. She reaches out to poke them, and gasps when she started to tug on them slightly.

"Uh, what are you doing?" Gamzee asks, licking his front teeth when she let go.

"Those aren't fake, are they?" Suki gasps slightly. God, even the horns on his head looked too good to be fake! There was no trace of a headband, and large Gamzee horns wouldn't stay on clips-

Lord, she was gonna be sick.

"Are you okay?" Gamzee is eyeing her weirdly as she starts to sway a bit.

"They aren't fake... it's not fake," she's gasping, trying to wrap her head around the concept. Trolls weren't real. They were never real. But dammit, he was bleeding INDIGO for crying out loud!

"You know, the little motherfucker said the same thing before he shanked me. Weird that he would think the horns and stuff were fake," Gamzee says, scratching his chin. "Actually though, I don't think we were allowed to say anything about being real trolls, since it would either freak the motherfuckers out or they would try and get the T or something, although you seem pretty fucking chill about it."

Gamzee also rambled about other stuff, but by then Suki wasn't even listening as she passed out on the ground due to her head trying to grasp the concept.

* * *

**Ugh, i'm sorry it's not my best chapter. I didn't want the next chapter to come out too late, and I have been sick the past couple of days, so my brain has been a little foggy and the creative vibes are a little out of whack... **

**I also hope I'm not the only one who has ever been stabbed with a fork by a child. I didn't make that part up entirely. **

**Remember, feedback is always appreciated! **


	7. Chapter 7

**Mother of GOG you guys! I already reached 40 reviews? I know that isn't a lot compared to other stories, but at this early in the story that's awesome! Thank you so much for the support :)**

**person: Haha I know! I think you mean Adam, since Evan is Suki's younger brother who keeps screaming. But yes, if he wants to keep his games... oh boy... thanks for reviewing!**

**Guest: my siblings did it, and they are pretty young so... I really don't know xD Kids are weird. Ouch about the berets though! Thanks for reviewing!**

**Now to continue on~**

* * *

Adam pouted as he fumbled with his house key. He wasn't keen on being in his house right now, knowing that Kanaya was still inside. Of course, the only other place he would go to would be Suki's house, and he definitely did not want to see her right now.

"Hello Adam," Kanaya says, her hands folded neatly over her one another. Adam looked up, surprised to see that his front door was already opened.

"... Hi," he says hesitantly. Kanaya was smiling sweetly, just as she did when she had arrived yesterday. Rather then the black shirt and red skirt combo she had on before, she wore a lovely red gown that fluttered just above her ankles. It was simple, yet lovely enough to make Adam blush a bit. Of course, being the stubborn boy he was, he shook his head and walked past her on his way inside. Kanaya closed the door behind him.

"Why does it smell like citrus?" Adam asks, taking a big wiff of the air. The scent was strong, but it was a nice change from the usual smell of dust and stale food.

"I just sprayed some stuff. I was bored and felt the need to clean today, I hope you don't mind," Kanaya answers in a very casual tone, walking past him into the living room. Adam doesn't follow her quite yet, as he is awestruck at his own home. Kanaya made it sound like she merely wiped off a single counter top, but after a good look around, that was obviously not the case. The whole house looked as if it had been scrubbed top to bottom- not a single ball of dust was found on the ground. In fact, the wooden floors below looked almost brand new, like nothing had ever scuffed them before- and that was only the floor.

"Kanaya, did you do all of this?" he asks as he walks into the living room. He stops, his brows rising at the sight of the personal sewing station Kanaya had set up. A mannequin was now displayed in the room, on the other side of the couch so it was out of the way. Some clothes were already displayed on the mannequin, although they were very boy-like for her taste.

"I just thought I would clean up a bit. Your house was a disaster when I arrived yesterday," Kanaya comments, her fingers working diligently on the jacket. She was picking back up where she left off on the sleeve.

"Yeah well, it's not like it ever gets cleaned," Adam muttered, using it as a weak defense against her comment on the house before. Kanaya chuckled a bit.

"I noticed. I scraped the dried food from the counter tops."

"There is a perfectly good explanation behind- are those my clothes?" Adam eyes the various torn pieces of clothing on the ground. They were a bunch of his grungy shirts that Kanaya found in his drawers and closet, and she was picking up little scrapes to add to the jacket she was working on.

"Just a few old pieces. I decided to use them to spice up your wardrobe a bit, which was almost as disastrous as the house itself," she says, finishing up what was left of the jacket. Adam eyed the clothing, angry about his clothes being torn apart, but he had to admit, the jacket was nice. It was black, which is the color that goes with anything, and Kanaya had added accents of various green and blue hues all over it to give it a splash of color.

"No one gave you permission to go through my closet! I can't believe you did this," He breathes, picking up a torn sweater off of the floor. He ignores Kanaya's jacket as he fumbled with the fabric in his hands.

"I know I didn't get any permission. I thought it would be a way for me to, as you say, start over?" Kanaya says, turning to him. "I know we didn't get off on the right foot yesterday, so I thought I could use this as a way to make up for it."

"You mean threatening me with a lipstick chainsaw?"

"That too. I should never have done that," she sighs. Adam throws the fabric at the ground.

"Day two. DAY FREAKING TWO, and you managed to push me over the edge, once again," Adam says. Kanaya tilted her head to the side.

"I do not think I understand. Care to explain?"

"Do you know how hard my mom works to get me these clothes?"

"She works in a clothing store, if I am not mistaken."

"Exactly! Now you tore up half of my wardrobe to make me one stupid jacket, no matter how cool it looks!" Adam yells, pulling at his hair. Kanaya frowns.

"I made other ones as well. I wouldn't destroy all your clothes to make a single jacket- that would just be silly. I was only trying to help you not look like a monstrosity," she sneered, a hint of venom in her voice. All day she had been working, trying to help make up for her rude actions yesterday. She cleaned the house for herself, but the clothes were an extension of her kindness to him, and he had no right to mock such a gift!

"AHA! So you admit to destroying my clothes," Adam yelled, pointing his finger at her. Kanaya crossed her arms.

"Yes. I also admit to finding a bottle of lotion, tissues, and raunchy magazines in your closet as well, although I was kind enough not to mess with those," she says. Adam's mouth then shut itself up, and his finger dropped to his side. His pale face is now a light shade of pink, and without breaking eye contact, he slowly backs out of the room. Kanaya rolled her eyes, turning back to her jacket.

"Why do I even bother," She mutters to herself, tearing the jacket off of the mannequin and tossing it away. She then stands there a few moments, and then runs over to fold it up and place it on the side of the couch angrily instead.

* * *

Suki groans as she wakes up, her head still a bit fuzzy. Her eyes were having a hard time opening as the harsh sunlight attacked them, but eventually she was able to open them up. Her eyes squinted to the skies above, only seeing a few clouds in the sky.

"It's motherfucking beautiful," Gamzee's voice cooed. Suki sat up, startled by the sudden speaking. She put a hand over her chest, feeling the quick beating of her heart before she turned her head.

"The clouds, the way they float and stuff. It's a miracle," Gamzee continues. The troll had been lying on the ground next to Suki's previously unconscious form, his hands underneath his head as he stretched himself out. His gaze was fixed on the sky above, watching as the clouds floated by and disappeared from his sight. Miracles, man.

"How long was I out?" she asked, looking down at him. Gamzee shrugged against the ground.

"No clue, sis. You were out for a while, motherfucker," he answered. Suki raised her brow at him.

"... And what, you just laid next to me the whole time?"

"I thought that's what were doing. Just lying down, chilling and shit," Gamzee says, slowly sitting up. He rested the palms of his hands against the ground, using them to prop himself up. He still slunk back on his shoulders though, slouching his back quite a bit as he relaxed himself.

"So, you didn't take into consideration that I just blacked out? Why did I black out again?" Suki mutters, scratching the side of her head. Gamzee sniffed, shrugging.

"I don't motherfucking know man. It just kinda happened, and-"

"Oh wait, now I remember," Suki says, turning her upper body towards Gamzee. She grabbed the color of his shirt with her hands, and shook him. "WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU TELL ME YOU WERE REAL?"

Gamzee stared at her with wide eyes, his brain taking a moment to register. His brain, the little part that hadn't been completely destroyed by the slime, was shaken around when she yanked him back and forth. Luckily, she had stopped after she screamed, although a crazy-looking expression remained on her face.

"Uh, because I wasn't supposed to say a motherfucking thing about it," Gamzee says, rolling his head to the side a bit. "Something about the fans either flipping shit, or trying to make their tentacle fantasies come true. You know, shit like that." Suki raised a brow, her mind now focusing on a smaller detail.

"So you guys _do _have tentacles?"

"Yeah, man," Gamzee put his hands on his pants. "Why, do you want a peek?"

"_Yes-_ I mean no," Suki shook her head, letting go of his shirt. She stood up and turned away for a second, trying to make herself stop blushing before she said anything else. Gamzee stood up as well, scratching the back of his head.

"This is just so unreal," Suki mutters. "I mean, I didn't think it was possible..."

"Uh, you aren't gonna flip shit, are you motherfucker?" Gamzee asked. Although he looked chill on the outside, on the inside he was getting a bit creeped out by Suki's muttering attitude. It made him feel a bit uneasy. That is, until she turns around, a huge smile on her face.

"Are you kidding? Of course I am!" She stops to squeal a bit. "Oh my God, I can't believe it's real! I can't believe _you're _real!" She gasps. "And those were the real Karkat and Kanaya too, weren't they? Oh God, Anya and Adam are gonna _freak!_ Well, Anya would, if I could find a way to prove it. Adam would probably just shit his pants and hide in his room or something." She rambled on like that, looking off into the distance. She wasn't really even talking to Gamzee anymore, who just stood there and waited patiently for her to finish her little rant. Of course, being who she was, Suki was going to go on and on like that until she ran out of breath and passed out on the ground again.

"Easy, motherfucker, just chill out a bit," Gamzee says, patting her shoulder to stop her. Suki turns around, and pulls him into a rather strong hug, jumping up and down.

"I'm just so excited! I didn't think Hussie was going to actually give us the real trolls? God, why would he do that? Does he have no clue how valuable you all are or something?" She lets go of him, brushing her shirt off a bit. "Uh, sorry. I'm just so happy, I have no other way to express it-"

"And that's cool, motherfucker," Gamzee smiled.

"Holy shit, I need to see Kanaya now," Suki says, her hands on her cheeks. Gamzee raised a brow.

"Why?"

"Because she is another real, living troll, is she not? Besides, I have no clue where Anya lives, otherwise I would see Karkat," Suki says, as if it was plainly obvious. Gamzee bit his lip, actually a little uncertain about that. Sure, it was cool that Suki was excited and all, but if Kanaya found out that he slipped on the second day-

"Don't just stand there! Come on!" Suki squeals, grabbing Gamzee's wrist and yanking him in the direction to Adam's house. It was going to be a long run, but it was gonna be worth it, man.

* * *

Kanaya was currently working on another outfit. Now, this wasn't one for Adam, but rather a new dress for her to wear if she ever wanted to. She usually would put together new clothes if she was upset, if she didn't have access to her chainsaw or a good rainbow drinker. Sadly, both other items were in the basement, where Adam was currently dwelling for the time being.

While she was sewing on another frill, the doorbell rang. She turns her head, and placed her needle down as she went to answer.

"Hello?" Kanaya said as she went to open the door. Unfortunately, it swung open right away, almost hitting her in the face if she hadn't reacted in time.

"Oh my God, I am SO sorry, but I just need to hug you," Suki blurts, immediately capturing Kanaya in a hug. The force of it caused Kanaya to give an "OOF" sound, and give a slight look of disgust when she discovered that the honey-haired girl was a tad sweaty from her run over there. It was fortunate that Suki's house wasn't too far from Adam's, otherwise it could have been a lot worse.

"Um, may I ask why?" Kanaya asked, giving Gamzee a questioning look as the other troll strolled on in. Gamzee had a nervous smile on his face, scratching the back of his head in a nervous way. Something was definitely up.

"Because you are real! You are a real, jade-blooded troll, and don't try to say otherwise," Suki pushed a finger to the side of her head, tapping it a bit. "I know, dude." Kanaya gave her a blank look, staring at Suki for a moment. Then she looks at Gamzee, who was now looking a lot more guilty then he did a second ago.

"Day two. DAY. TWO," Kanaya says, raising her voice a bit.

"I know, sis, I know. It was a motherfucking accident, I swear."

"Not even a week, and our secret is already spilled," Kanaya says, pinching the bridge of her nose in frustration. Hussie knew that the trolls would have been figured out eventually during their yearly stay, although he figured a few months would have passed before then. He took a risk when letting the fans having an experience with the trolls.

"Gosh, is it that big of a problem?" Suki asked, examining Kanaya's frustrated look. The rainbow drinker sighed, turning to her.

"In a way, it sort of was. Of course, I shouldn't be too surprised that you figured it out, even if it was very soon," she muttered the last part a little too quietly. Suki's eyes widened a bit.

"Oh man, are you guys going to get in trouble because of this? Holy shit, I am so sorry. I mean, I saw the indigo blood and I was all like 'dude, what the hell is that' and stuff-"

"You bled? From what?" Kanaya asked, looking over at Gamzee.

"The smaller motherfucker stabbed me with a fork, although it's cool now. I know he didn't mean it," Gamzee says, moving his hands outwards in a gesture, emphasizing of how weirdly okay he was with getting shanked. Kanaya looked back and forth between the two, unsure of what she was supposed to think.

"Suki," She decided it would be better to converse with the fan. "You won't tell anyone about this, right?" Suki shrugged.

"Yeah, sure, if that's what you want," she says, tilting her head to the side. "Although, why would Hussie send you all out, knowing it would cause trouble?"

"... Honestly, I don't know. You will probably have to ask Karkat about that- he always has some kind of conspiracy behind everything," Kanaya answered truthfully. We might find out later why Hussie wanted to take such a risk, although for the time being, it will remain a mystery.

"What's all the commotion up here? Suki?" Adam's voice suddenly sounded from behind. The three turned around, looking at the gamer boy. He was holding a shut DS in his hands, an annoyed expression on his face.

"Hey Adam! What's up?" Suki asks, pointing to Kanaya. "Dude, you are _never _going to believe this-"

"You are in a whole lot of trouble, Brooks," Adam says, stuffing his DS in the pocket of his sweatshirt. Suki raised a brow.

"With what?" She asked. Kanaya rolled her eyes.

"Here he goes again," she mutters. Adam points an accusing finger at the rainbow drinker.

"This chick has gone too far. Have you seen what she did to the house?" He asks. Suki looks around.

"Not really. Unless you mean the cleanliness of it," She answered.

"Yeah. She cleaned it."

"Really? That's so cool! Can you clean my house too?" Suki answered. Adam smacked his forehead.

"That's not the point! She cleaned it without any permission. She just does whatever she wants to around here," he sneered in Kanaya's direction. Suki gave him a dumbfounded look.

"Oh I see now. You're upset because Kanaya was sweet and cleaned your once-gross house without permission. Shame on you Kanaya. Shame."

"I don't see what is so wrong about cleaning up a bit."

"I was being sarcastic."

"Oh."

"No, and not only that, but she also tore my clothes to make new outfits," Adam continued, ignoring the brief discussion Kanaya and Suki had shared. Kanaya crossed her arms.

"I was just trying to clean up your wardrobe so you don't go walking around, looking like your rude personality," She jeered. Suki and Gamzee, who was currently spacing out before then, both made an "Ooo" sound, glancing at each other briefly. Adam's brows furrowed.

"Did you just insult me?"

"I think you can figure that out. You may be a jerk, but I know you aren't stupid as well."

"Now, now, come on motherfuckers. Let's just take a moment to chill out," Gamzee says, walking in between the two. "There is no need for harsh words here."

"Of course. I just need a simple apology, and all will be forgiven," Kanaya says calmly, folding her hands over one another. Adam's jaw dropped.

"_I _need to apologize? You should be the one apologizing!" He practically shouts. Suki put her hands up.

"Okay, whoa Adam. Gamzee's right, you need to chill out. Sheesh, no wonder she pulled a chainsaw on you," she mutters. Adam let out a long breath, running a hand through his hair.

"You are all crazy, I swear," he mutters. Kanaya sighs, rolling her eyes a bit.

"Okay, so the clothes part was maybe going a tad far, but there was no need to throw such a fit," She says, scolding. Suki shakes her head.

"Seriously Adam, she was doing you a favor there-"

"That's it, you and Gambee are _out of there,_" Adam shouted, pointing to the door.

"Actually, it's Gam_zee_, motherfu-"

"OUT," Adam shouted, pointing out the door. Gamzee and Suki reluctantly walked out, Suki waving at Kanaya.

"Oh, I almost forgot! Kanaya, can I _please _see your chainsaw-" The door was slammed shut as Suki asked her question. Adam turned around, looking at Kanaya again.

"As for you, we are going to get something straight here," Adam said. Kanaya was nearly at her breaking point with this boy, hardly caring about it being only the second day with him. Right as Adam was opening his mouth again to speak, Kanaya did what all rainbow drinkers would do.

"What are you- hey- HEY- AHHHH WHAT ARE YOU DOING! OH MY GOD ARE YOU _BITING _ME- AHHHH!"

"Ugh, I remember why I don't drink human blood," she mutters, wiping her chin off with a handkerchief as Adam cowered on the ground, holding the bite wound on his neck.

* * *

Meanwhile, Gamzee and Suki still remained in the front yard of Adam's house.

"Damn, he was like a full motherfucking Karkat in there," Gamzee comments, stuffing his hands in his pockets. Suki rolled her eyes.

"Eh, that's what he was like when Anya and I first met him," she says. "He flips out over a lot of stuff, but after a while he'll chill out. Kanaya's just gonna have to hang in there if she wants to see that side of him though."

"I think they just need to talk it out. Maybe sit back and chug a faygo, and let the miracles smooth things out," Gamzee says. Suki laughed a bit, holding her hand up to her mouth slightly. The stoned version of Gamzee was as funny and weird as he was in the web comic, almost in a charming kind of way if he didn't say 'motherfuck' so many times. But, you know, it was Gamzee, and that's just what the motherfucker did.

"Gamzee, I just have to ask you though," She says, trailing off a bit.

"Shoot, motherfucker," Gamzee says. Suki let out a sigh.

"It's alright to say no, I won't be upset, but..."

"Uh-huh."

"... Can I pester one of the other trolls? Because I really want to talk to one of them, because I love them all so much," she paused for a second. "Okay, maybe not Eridan, but still."

"I don't see a problem with it. If you want to say hi to the other motherfuckers, I say go for it."

"Oh my Gog, you are awesome," Suki says, jumping up and down in her excitement. Goodness, who was she going to pester first? Who did she want to talk to?

* * *

"Are you almost done on there? I need to get some work done," Anya says, a bit frustrated. Karkat glared over at her, refusing to move from his spot. He was having a perfectly fine time on the internet.

"Fuck no. I have been waiting for this video to load for the past five minutes, and I am going to fucking wait until I see it," He says, referring to the slow loading video on Youtube. Due to Anya's house being a bit out of the way, the internet was a bit too slow for anyone's liking. He started waving the mouse everywhere, clicking it repeatedly.

"For the love of fuck, why won't it load!" Karkat screamed. Anya slapped her hand on Karkat's, stopping the mouse immediately.

"Doing that is only going to freeze it up," she growled. Karkat looked up at her, a scowl on his face.

"Let go of my fucking hand," he says. Anya let's go, placing the hand on her hip instead.

"Could you please move then? I have to type up a paper. You have your own computer anyway," she says. Karkat shook his head.

"Your wifi fucking sucks, so I can hardly do shit with it," he grumbled. "But fine, take the fucking computer. It's not like it fucking works anyway." Karkat got up from the chair, allowing Anya to take it. As he was leaving the room, he wiped his hand on his sweater where Anya had touched it. Ever since he found the blue folder that contained Anya's hand-drawn hentai, he had taken extra precaution not to touch her, as if he would get some kind of disease from it.

"Fuck," he mumbles as he entered Anya's- I mean his current room. His laptop screen lit up, showing that Gamzee wanted to chat. He wasn't in the mood to talk at the moment, but since he had nothing better to do, why not?

**carcinoGeneticist [CG]** began trolling** terminallyCaprious [TC] ** **  
**

CG: FOR THE LOVE OF FUCK GAMZEE, THIS HAD BETTER BE IMPORTANT.

TC: OMGGGGGG Hi Karkles :D

CG: WHAT THE FUCK?

TC: This is so freaking cool. I can't believe I am actually using pesterchum! I didn't even know it existed!

TC: And now I am talking to you, and you even have your gimmick going. THIS IS AWESOME!

CG: GAMZEE, ARE YOU FEELING OKAY?

CG: HOW MANY OF THOSE FUCKING PIES HAVE YOU EATEN TODAY? I THINK YOU NEED TO LIE DOWN OR SOMETHING.

TC: Oh sorry! This isn't Gamzee :)

CG: WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT ISN'T GAMZEE?

CG: OH HOLY FUCK, WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO GAMZEE, YOU SICKO?

TC: LOL. No, he's letting me chat with you under his name, Karkles.

TC: It's Suki by the way.

CG: YOU MEAN THE CRAZY FUCK WE MET YESTERDAY, THROWING HERSELF AT THE CAR?

CG: HOW COULD I FORGET YOUR STUPIDLY DERANGED FACE.

TC: Yeah, I have been told I can be a hard face to forget.

CG: BY WHO, YOUR STUPID MOM LUSUS OR SOMETHING?

TC: Uhhh, yes actually.

TC: Wow Karkles, can you read minds too or something, or are you just really good at guessing?

CG: WILL YOU STOP CALLING ME 'KARKLES'. YOU HAVE NO PERMISSION TO CALL ME THAT.

TC: Yeah, I guess it's more of a Terezi thing anyway.

CG: IT'S NO ONE'S THING, SO DON'T DO IT.

TC: Then what can I call you?

CG: NOTHING. YOU CAN'T EVEN ADDRESS ME BY MY REAL NAME.

TC: Well, I have to give you some kind of nickname! Your name is, like, made for nicknames.

CG: NO, YOU CAN'T GIVE ME A FUCKING NICKNAME. WHERE IS GAMZEE?

TC: Can I call you Mr. Crabs, or is that too formal?

CG: FUCK NO.

TC: Okay. Karabby?

CG: STOP.

TC: Sir Crabington :D

CG: FUCK YOU.

TC: OH OH I KNOW!

TC: Crab-chan :D

******carcinoGeneticist [CG]** blocked** terminallyCaprious [TC]**

Karkat slammed his laptop shut, his cheeks a light red color. What was Gamzee thinking, letting his stupid fan use his laptop?

"Anya, can you come here for a second?" Karkat called out. It took a second, but Anya looked in the room.

"What?"

"Despite the blue folder, I think I hate your friend more then you," the troll states. Anya blinks a few times.

"... Okay then," she says, not really caring about it.

* * *

**Sorry if the Karkat scene was a little random to put in. I just felt bad that I haven't given him enough screen time, so I gave him a bit, and hopefully use him more next chapter.**

**On another note: I also went back and fixed the previous Karkat/Gamzee pesterlog chat, because I wrote Gamzee as "CT" rather than "TC." WHY DIDN'T YOU GUYS SAY ANYTHING?**

******Remember, feedback is always appreciated!**


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